Mar 06
30
bees
You know I was thinking that a good subject to talk about this week would be hate crime and racism. And to be honest it is a great subject. However… Bees and their use seem to be more of an issue for me at the moment.
Now I can understand what they do.. They live in a large social hierarchical structure. Everybody knows their job. The men do the housework, the women go out and raid the local flora whilst the queen sits about all self important barking orders and producing even more winged stripey devils. Now this works and they are the most important pollinating insect that the planet has. There is a bit of a burning question about all of this for me though..
what the *%@’ is the point in the *%@’ing stings?
Wasps I understand. They hunt for food. If you hunt and you’re aggresive and poisonous you need something to back you up. There’s no point in acting all hard and scary to your dinner if you aren’t tooled up. I mean, it’s like having a crowd of sweary clubbers at the door with a 7 foot bouncer trying to get rid of them with poetry and incidental music. So wasps thumbs up.
But Bees? I mean what is the point? Do they normally run into problems with rock-hard daffodils trying to withold their stash of pollen from them? Are they frequently involved in bar fights with pampas grass? No so they don’t need their damn stings. Get rid of the stings and chill out. You have nobody to fight, stupid bees.
And if you’re thinking it’s to stop us stealing their hunny, you’re wrong. Every bee that is worth his salt knows that the beekeeper is the only person after his hunny, and he mellows them all out with his crazy smoking teapot.
Come on bees, give your stings back. You’re not big and you’re not clever.